Why we do what we do.

About 2 weeks ago, I tripped while out on a run and injured my leg. I had a big cut on my knee, and the knee became stiff and swollen. I had trouble both bending and straightening that leg for about a week, but then the wound started to scab and the leg and joint started to ease and loosen. For the past few days, while I've been driving too and from work, whenever I've seen people running I've thought to myself, "I wish that was me running".

My knee after my tumble 2 weeks ago.

While I've been unable to run it has allowed me to think at times about why I do run. That sounds a bit weird, but let me explain. In about 2 months I'm going to be running a race over 13km, and I had built a training program to help build strength, speed and stamina. But really, I'm not bothered about how fast I go, or even how far I go. To me it's just important to be able to go out and run, and I really enjoy it. So when I couldn't run I missed the actual physical workouts. I didn't miss running certain distances, or running at certain speeds, but I did miss 'just running'.

This morning, I ran for the first time in 2 weeks, and it was pretty tiring. I ran a very leisurely 5km and found my muscles were aching afterwards, and I was short of breath during the run. The knee didn't bother me, though I was aware of it. All in all, it was nothing more than a short, slow recovery run, and that is the way things will be for at least this week. And after this I have decided to reset my goals. Instead of going for longer and faster, I am just going to run, however far and however fast I want to. I have a general aim of running half marathon distances, but it's the actual joy of getting out and doing what I do that is what I get a buzz from.

My new goal is to run 4 times a week, though this might not happen for a couple of weeks while I recover fully.  I have also set goals in some other activities that I enjoy, but learning from this experience may alter those aims, as I try to work out what it really is I want from each thing I do. I think that a short period of being unable to do something that I really enjoy has given me a different perspective on why I do that thing, and sometimes we get so involved that with details that we lose the bigger picture.

Run faster? Run longer? Or just run and enjoy the glorious views along the way?